Monito is so very firmly ensconced in the terrible twos - at 18 months - that I can barely stand him. He is trying my patience with such an unrelenting vigor that I find myself yelling at him much of the day. I didn't start here, trust me. It was a natural progression of him proving that my patient, calm, playful parenting techniques are woefully insufficient in mitigating the assault that his emerging autonomy presents. My ass, figuratively speaking, has been whupped.
This morning, I left Pequita at nursery coop and took the boy to the store to return some things. He sat in the shopping cart facing me and once he got bored (42 seconds later) he started hitting me. He does this all the time, and I start out each day with a full glass of patience and over time shift to feeling totally drained of all tolerance. I've tried being loving, understanding, firm, pretend-crying to show results, and also tried angry, time outs, and a couple bad mommy moments of whacking back. Lightly, but still. Let me share with anyone reading that the concept of, "See? See how much hitting hurts?" doesn't actually help the kid learn.
So there we are in the cart. As I push him along the aisle he is hitting my hands, whacking at my chest, slapping at my face. I keep talking to him, sing a little Frosty The Snowman, and try to ignore the gleeful laughter and flashing eyes that the hits that connect with my body elicit. I finally tire of this and stop to peruse some nice dish towels, parking the cart about 2 feet away from me. He SCREAMS and sobs. People look at me funny as I calmly ignore my screaming child. I let this go on for almost 3 full minutes without a word until he starts signing 'sorry' and wailing 'oh-ree'. I quickly hug him, he stops crying and all is well. We repeated this many more times before leaving. We do this all day.
He is also back to screaming and thrashing with each attempt to dress/ undress or diaper him. (Sorry, Diva, I know that's bad news.). I now strive simply for mental calm as I pin him down with my legs on the floor and forcibly take care of business. He is fine upon being rendered upright again.
A) if you are one of the people who clucked your tongue at me upon witnessing one of these events in public, or told my children in a stage whisper - right in front of me - that 'not all mommies yell', well, may your children and grand kids have colic until they're 18.
B) if anyone has any constructive, positive advice or techniques you can suggest I welcome it. Or even better- horror stories of your own!
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